The 5 worst things you can say to a single mum!

I’ve been single for a few years now and for some reason that I don’t quite grasp other people have a much harder time accepting this than I ever have, it’s as if they believe they can catch single. I purposely cough on them in hopes that they believe they’ve caught the divorce plague! The first few months everyone was fully supportive, I was reminded to ‘take time to figure yourself out first’ which is exactly what I needed to do……and I did and it was fucking glorious! Well meaning family and friends started telling me that I was still young and could still find someone if I just got out there. Out Where? And why the fuck is he hiding in the first place and WHY TF do I need to find HIM?! When did dating become an adult version of extreme hide and seek? Man with glasses hiding behind green leaf Unwanted advice and just shitty comments from people in relationships about what I should do now and how to do it with kids in the mix came flying at me thick and fast, Even when I said I wasn’t ready and couldn’t see myself being for a very, VERY long time the shitty comments were still freely supplied. Maybe they thought I must be lying and just protested my love for single life out of fear of rejection or something but the need to be a DICK was strong in these ones and their comments were fucking doozies and these 5 were the worst of the worst. Not only a little offensive but just a bit cunty! 1. You can still find someone even with 4 kids. Awww Thank yo…….Wait, what? So would 2 kids better my chances because if that is gonna help me ‘snatch up a good catch’ I know which two I’ll get rid of! Ohhhh you mean because I’ve carried 4 children that I’m damaged goods but luckily some men are happy to lower their standards and maybe if I’m a real good girl they’ll love me (and my huge vagina) just the way I am? Good to know! 2. Maybe it’s time you lower your standards just a little’ I know right! Black writing on white background oh the irony of it all . Mum that’s a bad word logo Those pesky high standards that I have, that’s what’s stopping me from finding a DECENT man. I should definitely lower them! 3. Your kids DESRVE a positive male role model. Mmmmhmmm yes because when I was a little girl I used to dream of being a single mum with absolutely no support from a partner, I imagined how grand life would be if my children had only one parent and when my babies father passed well, all my hopes and dreams had finally come true….. Get the fuck out Chad! 4. I completely understand, my husband works long hours. Nope, just nope. Being a single mum who has absolutely no emotional, physical or financial support whatsoever (especially as my daughters father died) is absolutely nothing like having a partner who works away or works long hours. Yes that is hard I know I’ve done that too and quite honestly I find being a sole parent easier than partnered at times but they are different parenting situations. You can not compare Wine with spirits, they’ll both get you smashed but they are different in every other way. Not worse, not better, you’ll still get a mad fucking hangover from them both but just different. Don’t make this a competition or about you… 5. And this is my FAVE, Don’t tell them you have kids until after a few dates! Grey dog with head tilted to side How does one go about negating the fact that they have 4 children for not 1, not 2, but multiple dates. I don’t know about you but I am boring as fuck! I literally have NOTHING else to talk to you about besides the weather, the amount of time and extensive prepping it took me to get ready for the date and the Copious amount of alcohol I consumed to get the courage to actually leave my house, the fact that I REALLY like the show The good place (it’s hilarious and you should definitely Netflix binge the shit out of that!) and my kids……that is the entirety of my conversation itinerary for the night. So help me out here Janice but how dafaq am I going to ‘forget’ to mention the 4 smallish humans that sucked the life out of my once perky tits and are now just sucking the life out of me in general, huh…HUH??? I love those little parasites by the way, I am not ashamed of them or of being a single mum and will NOT EVER pretend like my babies don’t exist to make someone else happy! OH and also I FUCKING love being single, so there’s that…..

10 Comments on “The 5 worst things you can say to a single mum!

  1. I don’t have kids but I was raised by a single mum and the amount of pressure she got to do everything right and not stuff up was crazy. A lot of my anxieties etc come from seeing how she was expected to be as a mother and from me trying to help her be that

    Liked by 1 person

    • It comes at us from every direction, people expect perfection from mums in general but single mums really do cop it because ‘we’re all the kids have got’

      That’s a lot of pressure for you as a child Hun I can only imagine the anxiety💔

      Like

  2. Haha I’ve had all of these but my favourite is definitely number 1. My parents of all people told me this after I had my third baby and didn’t understand why it annoyed me 😂 Good to know that despite the fact that I’m apparently not very good, someone will deign to still love me, despite my kids. I’d rather stay single tbh 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Haha I know they do it out of love and honestly not knowing what else to say but it stings a little!! Hahaha

      I love being single babe, I find it easier! 😂

      Like

  3. It makes people way more comfortable if we tick their boxes! I laughed out loud at the picture of the bloke hiding in a bush 😂 I never understand why we should be desperately searching for this “perfect” man and hoping he accepts us EVEN though we have kids!! I don’t know about you lot but me and my girls are a fucking catch and anyone in our lives in bloody lucky to know us! When you decide you have met someone worthy of spending precious time with your beautiful family, they will be the lucky one! Xx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve just become a single mum and I’m already anticipating these type of comments and altercations. I hate that being a single mum has this negative connotation when all it is is that you are a mother who is single. That’s it. It doesn’t make us any less or more happy than a married mother or any other type of mother. A mother is a mother and my singleness doesn’t change my ability to be a mother like any other mother. Let me not rant in your comments lol.

    Thank you for sharing! x

    Lydia x | lydiaonlife.com

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hahahah rant away mumma!! I have to say it’s not as bad where I live, I am in an area with a high rate of single parents but I still get these comments from people who don’t know me too well .

      I hope you’re doing ok, Newly single is the scariest time but it really does get easier (one less big man child in my case!) and is mumma’s are fierce, we can do anything xxxx

      Like

  5. This is spot on! Whenever anyone asks about my partner and I tell them it’s just me and my son, they do the pity gasp and try to offer me some advice, y’know, just incase I’m only single because I have no idea how to speak to adults anymore haha!

    I love being a single mum, it’s brought out the best in me and my son!

    Liked by 1 person

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