Motherhood can be so lonely.

Motherhood can get so fucking lonely! There, I said it!

How often I get asked ‘but you have 4 kids, how can you feel lonely?!

Whether I had 1, 4 or 45 kids the loneliness is not about being alone mums are never really alone.

We can’t take a shower without our kids taking the hot water tap turning on as their cue to come in with a broken doll that they haven’t wanted for the past 3 fucking years, ripping open the shower door to hysterically explain why we need to find and fix the dolls missing leg RIGHT NOW and then stand there and cry the entire time only for us to get out search the house, find the leg, fix the doll and for them to tell you the doll is creepy and never play with it again!

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Yes I have 4 kids and yes they are all girls..

‘Oh wow another girl!! You didn’t give poor daddy his boy, you’ll have to keep trying!!

I can not tell you how many times people said that to me with each pregnancy announcement and never quite understood other people’s disappointment in my bringing little human into the word regardless of gender.

I was young and let the comments slide mostly thinking it was just because we had an overwhelmingly imbalanced girl to boy ratio in the family but over the years I’d heard these remarks made constantly to friends and family and then a few days ago I saw a very similar comment made by one mum to another mumma expecting her 4th girl on a group I follow….’oh no, poor daddy!!!!!

WTAF, WHY POOR DADDY?

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The day I became a woman wasn’t what I expected.

Today I read a post about a young mans beautiful reaction to a girl getting her first period on a bus and it reminded me of when I got mine…… and the monumental clusterfuck it was!

When I was younger my mum worked a lot and as a young single Mum working full time I spent a lot of time with another family the Sweeney’s.

When I was 12 way back when you could still sit in the back of a station wagon and share seat belts between three of us kids without being arrested and branded the worst parents to ever live I went on holidays with Chris (the mum of the fambob) and the 4 kids to a caravan park we visited each year.

I was a bit of late bleeder and still hadn’t got my period and my tits hadn’t come in yet (they still haven’t!) and I was at the stage where I was chanting ‘I must, I must, I must increase my bust’ into the mirror daily and hoping to get my period so I could be ‘mature and womanly’ after reading ‘Are you there god? It’s me, Margaret’

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Enough with the Mum shaming!

You are way too young for a baby.

You are too old for another kid.

Maybe think about abortion you really can’t afford another kid.

Abortion is murder in my eyes.

Stay active during this pregnancy you don’t want to get too fat it’s harder to lose at your age!

You are eating for two now you need to really eat more.You shouldn’t eat that though, that will kill your baby…

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No married men allowed!

I recently had an ‘old friend’ add me on fb, he was someone I used to know and spent quite a few of my teen years with drinking, partying and getting all kinds of high with.

I was a mess of a teen and had a major drug and alcohol addiction and with that comes stupid decisions like fucking guys that I found repulsive when sober and let them treat me pretty shockingly, one night this particular douche canoe even stole my car and brought it back in the morning just ruined with SLUT scratched into the bonnet because I told him I wouldn’t date him (I know right) but the friend who added recently me was never really a cunt, just a sheep..

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