Tag: #consentmatters
Consent matters, we have the right to say NO!!
Posted on December 1, 2018 by Christielee
A few days back my daughters friend came home and told her mother, a close friend of mine, that at the year 6 formal that if a boy asks a girl to dance with them that they should not say no because it could…
I really wanted boys.
.
With each pregnancy I hoped that I would catch a glimpse of a little penis flapping around in the amniotic fluid at each ultrasound because I was terrified that I’d raise my girls to be just like me. .
I was terrified of raising mini me’s because I was never one of the cool kids, I was the foul mouthed, cocky teen with too much to say and not enough to back it up with...
.
I lacked finesse and never found it not that I was ever actively looking🤷♀️
.
My mouth ran much faster than what my mind did and it only caught up once I experienced verbal diarrhoea and there was no way of slurping that shit back up...
.
I was petrified that they’d be the type of girls that when we left their friends homes after a play date the secret squirrel parents would call upon the mummy mafia to ban together to oust my crotch monkeys from the ever elusive ‘inner circle’ I worked so hard to infiltrate. .
Years of meticulous planning dollar coin donation school events and mastering the art of under exaggerating the amount of sugar in the cupcakes for the Mother’s Day stalls would be wasted and all for nothing!! .
Today as we sat in the car waiting for the girls to finish school I was loudly singing to the radio and Amarlie was playing with her dolls and I heard her let one rip over the music, I looked in the rear view mirror and Miss A was laughing to herself and made one doll say to the other ‘I just fanny farted’ .
And it was at that exact moment I realised how happy I am that I had all girls and that they all have some parts of me, they have the better parts of me like my resilience, my empathy, my creative mind, my ability to forgive and to love unconditionally and my ability to clear a room with a single ass blast....
.
My little Queen La-Queefer is exactly like me and I couldn’t be any fucking prouder!
.
#mumthatsabadword #mumlifethelabel
Mama and mama’s mini tees from @mumlifethelabel
I considered not sharing this photo on here, I get so caught up on what Instagram mums are supposed to look like that sharing a photo like this becomes an argument with inner self.
.
No make up, no filters, acne scarred skin, hair not done, fluff all over my clothes, no tan and a rolly tummy.....it’s all laid bare and just waiting to be judged.
.
There are things about me that I could pick apart, I could focus all of my energy on what needs to be changed and what I need to fix but then I’d miss the absolute beauty of this image.
.
There is something so sobering knowing that My baby doesn’t care that my I don’t have my face made up or that I have acne scars, she doesn’t notice that my hair is a mess or the white fluff on my black hoodie.
.
My baby doesn’t give a shit if I am pasty white or that my belly has stretch marks, a snail trail, a c-section scar and some flabby rolls, she is absolutely oblivious to it all.
.
All my baby knows is how she feels when she lays her head on my soft fleshy belly and how she feels loved and safe and protected.
.
She plays with my stomach and never does she look disgusted or like she is trying to figure out how to make the bloat disappear to reveal an amazing flat washboard stomach, she just holds it and squishes it into a doughnut and giggles her little head off about mummy’s ‘yummy tummy’ 🍩 .
I want my girls to love and truly appreciate their bodies, I want them to understand that our perceived flaws are actually what make us unique and beautiful.
.
What I say about me in front of them will become their inner voice, the cycle of self doubt and lacking confidence will continue.
.
I would like to look like an Instagram mum.
I’d like to have beautiful clear skin.
I’d really like to have a washboard belly.
But I really LOVE that my baby will still come and rest her head on my yummy doughnut tummy.
.
So I am learning to not pick myself apart and to post the pics and of course I’m going to continue to enjoy every single squishy cuddle I can get for as long as she will give them.
When did it become the norm to use the phrase ‘real mums’ in order to shame women after we have kids?
Shaming Mums who lose the baby weight ‘too slowly’ eagerly pointing out how unhealthy it is. That there’s no excuse for a ‘real mum’ not to be able to lose the weight within a few months if they got off their fat ass instead of binge watching Netflix, eating pizzas and bags of twisties & washing it all down with coke every night.
Shaming mums who lost the weight ‘too quickly’ because that’s just as unhealthy and obviously they’re starving themselves and taking something to help them get skinny because ‘real mums’ can’t do that on their own... Shaming mums who have c-sections because apparently women have to birth their tiny humans vaginally to qualify as a ‘real mum’
Shaming those who can not or choose not to breastfeed because only ‘real mums’ can and will produce milk and feed their babies, ‘real mums’ wouldn’t dream of using formula.. I’m a mum and a real human being so does that constitute as being a ‘REAL MUM?
I have given birth vaginally 3 times, 1 Bub on on a bed, one on the on the bathroom floor, one in the bath and I had a c-section with Amarlie Briallen
I breastfed some of my babies until my cracked nipples bled and I hallucinated with high temps from mastitis and then I didn’t even dare to try and breastFeed other babies other than their first feed and made formula bottles at all hours.. I had severe PND after 3 of my bubs and was perfectly fine after the 4th.
I changed a LOT of shitty nappies.
I have been vomited, shit and pissed on more times than I can count.
I rocked my girls to sleep and sometimes they slept in their cot, sometimes in my bed and sometimes on my chest on the lounge when I finally passed out.
I keep a house, cook meals and I wash 1000’s of loads of small clothes and still have 76 loads to do every👏single👏day👏
I ate healthy and cooked everything from scratch some days and I ate pizza and twisties washed down with coke on other days whilst keeping 4 kids alive and happy.
Continued in comments
🐰Curiouser & curiouser 🎩 .
🌈Amarlie in Wonderland 💕
.
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
#unitycircle1 #keepthemlittle #kidsofinstagram #girlscan #kids #mermaid #mermaidhair #mixedracekids #southafrican #australian #sydneymums #sydneymum #mumsofsydney #beautifulkids #smile #lifeisbeautiful #mumswithcameras #mumswithhustle #aquahair #braids #braidstyles #kidshairstyles #bestandless #blogger #aliceinwonderlandquotes #beauty #curiouserandcuriouser
#ad - The absolutely beautiful Jess @braid_away_by_jess messaged me and offered to do miss Amarlies hair in braids knowing everything we have been through these past 18 months and I am so appreciative, we absolutely LOVE them!!
.
I am not going to lie, I am terrible at doing hair(that’s why mines always short!) and I really struggle doing the girls dead straight hair but even more so doing A’s curly hair and rely on her aunty’s and Gammy’s advice on how to keep it well.
.
I am learning about the different types of hair and what natural products to use (thanks for your blog @batmom8503 I love you girl!!) .
I am absolutely loving the mustard tights and rainbow jumper from @bestandless , everything just went today and she looks like mummy’s little rainbow wild child🌈 .
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
.
#curlygirlmethod #curlyhair #southafricangirl #braids #bestandless #mixedbabies #beautifulmixedkids #braided #aquahair #girlscan #keepthemlittle #kidsofinstagram #kidsfashion #kidshairstyles #southafricanprincess #rainbowhair #curlynaturalhair #naturalhair #wildchild #braidedhair #kidsbraids #bestandless #bestandlesskids #mummyblogger #sydneymums #mama #curlsaunaturel #mumswithcameras #unitycircle1
I am a solo mum.
.
I am not just a single parent, to me that implies I am only a half of a team and that my kids are missing out, I AM a double parent.
.
I need to do double the work now.
I happily give double the love.
I am available for my kids double the amount of time.
I need to earn double the money.
I give double the advice and get ignored double the time!
.
I get double the hugs and kisses and
I deal with double the tears and sadness.
.
I am a solo mum, I am solely responsible for my girls 💯 of the time and my single status has nothing to do with my parenting, there is nothing half about what I do.
.
I am a solo mum doing double the parenting and pretty fucking proud of that!
.
#solomum tee from @mumlifethelabel .
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
#tattooedmum #doublemum #parenting #singleparent #singleparenting #motherhoodintheraw #motherhoodunplugged #tee #mumfashion #mummyblogger #soloparenting #soloparent #hugsandkisses #mama #mumlife #family #rippedjeans #love #bhfyp #mumssupportingmums #sydney #sydneymums #mumbloggers #raisingmytribe #motherhoodsimplified #bloggerlife #honestmommin #raisingkidsalone
I really wanted boys.
.
With each pregnancy I hoped that I would catch a glimpse of a little penis flapping around in the amniotic fluid at each ultrasound because I was terrified that I’d raise my girls to be just like me. .
I was terrified of raising mini me’s because I was never one of the cool kids, I was the foul mouthed, cocky teen with too much to say and not enough to back it up with...
.
I lacked finesse and never found it not that I was ever actively looking🤷♀️
.
My mouth ran much faster than what my mind did and it only caught up once I experienced verbal diarrhoea and there was no way of slurping that shit back up...
.
I was petrified that they’d be the type of girls that when we left their friends homes after a play date the secret squirrel parents would call upon the mummy mafia to ban together to oust my crotch monkeys from the ever elusive ‘inner circle’ I worked so hard to infiltrate. .
Years of meticulous planning dollar coin donation school events and mastering the art of under exaggerating the amount of sugar in the cupcakes for the Mother’s Day stalls would be wasted and all for nothing!! .
Today as we sat in the car waiting for the girls to finish school I was loudly singing to the radio and Amarlie was playing with her dolls and I heard her let one rip over the music, I looked in the rear view mirror and Miss A was laughing to herself and made one doll say to the other ‘I just fanny farted’ .
And it was at that exact moment I realised how happy I am that I had all girls and that they all have some parts of me, they have the better parts of me like my resilience, my empathy, my creative mind, my ability to forgive and to love unconditionally and my ability to clear a room with a single ass blast....
.
My little Queen La-Queefer is exactly like me and I couldn’t be any fucking prouder!
.
#mumthatsabadword #mumlifethelabel
Mama and mama’s mini tees from @mumlifethelabel
I considered not sharing this photo on here, I get so caught up on what Instagram mums are supposed to look like that sharing a photo like this becomes an argument with inner self.
.
No make up, no filters, acne scarred skin, hair not done, fluff all over my clothes, no tan and a rolly tummy.....it’s all laid bare and just waiting to be judged.
.
There are things about me that I could pick apart, I could focus all of my energy on what needs to be changed and what I need to fix but then I’d miss the absolute beauty of this image.
.
There is something so sobering knowing that My baby doesn’t care that my I don’t have my face made up or that I have acne scars, she doesn’t notice that my hair is a mess or the white fluff on my black hoodie.
.
My baby doesn’t give a shit if I am pasty white or that my belly has stretch marks, a snail trail, a c-section scar and some flabby rolls, she is absolutely oblivious to it all.
.
All my baby knows is how she feels when she lays her head on my soft fleshy belly and how she feels loved and safe and protected.
.
She plays with my stomach and never does she look disgusted or like she is trying to figure out how to make the bloat disappear to reveal an amazing flat washboard stomach, she just holds it and squishes it into a doughnut and giggles her little head off about mummy’s ‘yummy tummy’ 🍩 .
I want my girls to love and truly appreciate their bodies, I want them to understand that our perceived flaws are actually what make us unique and beautiful.
.
What I say about me in front of them will become their inner voice, the cycle of self doubt and lacking confidence will continue.
.
I would like to look like an Instagram mum.
I’d like to have beautiful clear skin.
I’d really like to have a washboard belly.
But I really LOVE that my baby will still come and rest her head on my yummy doughnut tummy.
.
So I am learning to not pick myself apart and to post the pics and of course I’m going to continue to enjoy every single squishy cuddle I can get for as long as she will give them.
When did it become the norm to use the phrase ‘real mums’ in order to shame women after we have kids?
Shaming Mums who lose the baby weight ‘too slowly’ eagerly pointing out how unhealthy it is. That there’s no excuse for a ‘real mum’ not to be able to lose the weight within a few months if they got off their fat ass instead of binge watching Netflix, eating pizzas and bags of twisties & washing it all down with coke every night.
Shaming mums who lost the weight ‘too quickly’ because that’s just as unhealthy and obviously they’re starving themselves and taking something to help them get skinny because ‘real mums’ can’t do that on their own... Shaming mums who have c-sections because apparently women have to birth their tiny humans vaginally to qualify as a ‘real mum’
Shaming those who can not or choose not to breastfeed because only ‘real mums’ can and will produce milk and feed their babies, ‘real mums’ wouldn’t dream of using formula.. I’m a mum and a real human being so does that constitute as being a ‘REAL MUM?
I have given birth vaginally 3 times, 1 Bub on on a bed, one on the on the bathroom floor, one in the bath and I had a c-section with Amarlie Briallen
I breastfed some of my babies until my cracked nipples bled and I hallucinated with high temps from mastitis and then I didn’t even dare to try and breastFeed other babies other than their first feed and made formula bottles at all hours.. I had severe PND after 3 of my bubs and was perfectly fine after the 4th.
I changed a LOT of shitty nappies.
I have been vomited, shit and pissed on more times than I can count.
I rocked my girls to sleep and sometimes they slept in their cot, sometimes in my bed and sometimes on my chest on the lounge when I finally passed out.
I keep a house, cook meals and I wash 1000’s of loads of small clothes and still have 76 loads to do every👏single👏day👏
I ate healthy and cooked everything from scratch some days and I ate pizza and twisties washed down with coke on other days whilst keeping 4 kids alive and happy.
Continued in comments
🐰Curiouser & curiouser 🎩 .
🌈Amarlie in Wonderland 💕
.
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
#unitycircle1 #keepthemlittle #kidsofinstagram #girlscan #kids #mermaid #mermaidhair #mixedracekids #southafrican #australian #sydneymums #sydneymum #mumsofsydney #beautifulkids #smile #lifeisbeautiful #mumswithcameras #mumswithhustle #aquahair #braids #braidstyles #kidshairstyles #bestandless #blogger #aliceinwonderlandquotes #beauty #curiouserandcuriouser
#ad - The absolutely beautiful Jess @braid_away_by_jess messaged me and offered to do miss Amarlies hair in braids knowing everything we have been through these past 18 months and I am so appreciative, we absolutely LOVE them!!
.
I am not going to lie, I am terrible at doing hair(that’s why mines always short!) and I really struggle doing the girls dead straight hair but even more so doing A’s curly hair and rely on her aunty’s and Gammy’s advice on how to keep it well.
.
I am learning about the different types of hair and what natural products to use (thanks for your blog @batmom8503 I love you girl!!) .
I am absolutely loving the mustard tights and rainbow jumper from @bestandless , everything just went today and she looks like mummy’s little rainbow wild child🌈 .
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
.
#curlygirlmethod #curlyhair #southafricangirl #braids #bestandless #mixedbabies #beautifulmixedkids #braided #aquahair #girlscan #keepthemlittle #kidsofinstagram #kidsfashion #kidshairstyles #southafricanprincess #rainbowhair #curlynaturalhair #naturalhair #wildchild #braidedhair #kidsbraids #bestandless #bestandlesskids #mummyblogger #sydneymums #mama #curlsaunaturel #mumswithcameras #unitycircle1
I am a solo mum.
.
I am not just a single parent, to me that implies I am only a half of a team and that my kids are missing out, I AM a double parent.
.
I need to do double the work now.
I happily give double the love.
I am available for my kids double the amount of time.
I need to earn double the money.
I give double the advice and get ignored double the time!
.
I get double the hugs and kisses and
I deal with double the tears and sadness.
.
I am a solo mum, I am solely responsible for my girls 💯 of the time and my single status has nothing to do with my parenting, there is nothing half about what I do.
.
I am a solo mum doing double the parenting and pretty fucking proud of that!
.
#solomum tee from @mumlifethelabel .
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
#tattooedmum #doublemum #parenting #singleparent #singleparenting #motherhoodintheraw #motherhoodunplugged #tee #mumfashion #mummyblogger #soloparenting #soloparent #hugsandkisses #mama #mumlife #family #rippedjeans #love #bhfyp #mumssupportingmums #sydney #sydneymums #mumbloggers #raisingmytribe #motherhoodsimplified #bloggerlife #honestmommin #raisingkidsalone
