Tag: #ifonly
Why I didn’t talk about my abuse until now.
Posted on September 27, 2018 by Christielee
Trigger warning – rape mentioned* This is the hardest blog I ever have or will ever need to write but I can no longer remain silent. The first time I was sexually abused was by a family member and someone I loved and admired,…
She lost her daddy to suicide a year ago now and it hasn’t gotten easier and it isn’t getting better.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She has been having a lot of moments lately, she has been crying over the smallest of things, slamming doors and yelling at me and her sisters telling us she hates us.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She asks me to look at his photos I have kept on my phone most mornings and some days it makes her happy and I watch as her eyes light up and a huge smile creeps across her face and I know that day will be a good day.
Other days she snuggles into me and tells me she doesn’t remember her daddy and asks me to tell her stories to each one of the pictures, tears roll down her cheeks and she sobs and sobs hard. I know these days will not be so good.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She watches tv and I can see her little brain working overtime, I know her inquisitive mind is trying to process what is happening and then she asks me why movie characters can die and then be ok again, can daddy be ok again?
She doesn’t understand yet.
She sees me cry when she is feeling heartbroken, she knows I get sad when she is sad and then thinks it is her fault, she asks if she upset me as she wipes away my tears and I tell her that she makes mummy the happiest mummy in the entire world.
I can’t tell her that I am angry at the world, I am angry that this happened to her and I am angry that I am powerless to mend her tiny broken heart.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She doesn’t understand why she has these feelings and outbursts and often cries and asks why she is so sad in her heart.
She has been dreaming of her daddy lately, she wakes herself up by calling him out for him and all I can do is hold her as she cries herself back to sleep whispering that I will never leave her even though I know that I shouldn’t make that promise to her but her fear of me leaving her consumed her some days.
She doesn’t understand yet. (Continued in comments and link in bio)
Me: I’m being too political with my posts lately go back to what you know.... .
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Also me:
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@the.pringle.collection thanks for the tee babe!
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.
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@willconnooly_
Some days I wake up and have my shit together, other days I am literally mumming on fumes.....today is that day.
.
.
Being sick and not sleeping is taking its toll on my mental health and depression is creeping in slowly. Having bipolar disorder can leave me feeling like Alice in Wonderland and when I feel myself falling down that all too familiar rabbit hole the fear of never finding my way out is very real.
.
.
I get to the crossroads with ‘this way’ and ‘that way’ Signs pointing in every direction with only the Mad Hatter to ask for directions only the mad hatter is just a reflection of me trapped in my own mind.
.
.
Tonight I am taking it easy, I am giving myself a break and being kind to me and enjoying a tea. I fed the kids chips and pies, I let them watch tv and had absolutely no fucks to give!
.
.
Then I sent them to bed way before their normal bedtime.... if they get up then Off with their heads!
.
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
#bipolar #bipolardisorderawareness #depression #gotobed #chipsandpies #beingkind #bekindtoyourself #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealth #bpd #madhatter #nofucksgiven #mumstyle #mummyblogger #motherhoodunplugged #parentingunplugged #raw #realshit #greentea #selfawareness #forgivingmyself #mumming
Because She kicks like a girl!
.
.
I am sure you have all read the headlines about the sexual abuse Tayla Harris received online when the AFLW posted this photo of Tayla kicking like a girl, the comments were vile and so were the men who wrote them. .
.
7AFL made the decision to remove the photo instead of the men who made the comments and have gone on to issue an apology and reinstate the photo after realising what an absolute monumental fuck up that was and realising (with help from the public) the negative impact of the message that it sent to not only women, but to the men who believe that this is ok and engage in such online abuse.
.
.
To the men who made derogatory comments, FUCK YOU AND YOUR NOISE!
.
.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING NOISE!
.
.
This is an outstanding photo of a phenomenal sports person doing her job and doing it damn well I might add, I hope that more young people see Tayla for the role model she is.
.
.
I can only hope that young people everywhere emulate her dedication to the path they choose in their lives and that they too learn how to kick like a girl!
.
.
(Photo credit to Michael Wilson at afl media)
.
.
@tayla_harris #mumthatsabadword
We’ve all seen egg boy and his now famous egg attack on that politician, what’s his face’ and I’m not here to comment whether I’m team egg boy or team fuck face (hint: I did NOT get a team Fuck face shirt made!) instead I wanted to talk about a comment I read in one of the threads.
Scrolling through the comments and this guy who according to his profile pic is a ginger cat holding an Aussie flag named Frank had made a judgment that went a little something like ‘little prick must of been brought up by a single mother... Woah!!!! Settle down there tiger, who owns you, Terri freaking Crews?
I have been a single mum since my baby’s father died a year ago and I am a damn good single mother, the stigma that we are all sitting on welfare and sucking our ex’s bank accounts dry in child support whilst our unruly kids run wild in the streets is an old tired story that keeps getting told but it is a really boring, unintelligent story.
Single mothers are some of the most resourceful people on the planet, we need to be able to help our children overcome any issues that arise on the spot and be ingenious about it. When my kids show me their homework and ask for help I die a little more inside and then google the shit out of how to do math with letters and figure out how A+B =Z!
We take on 100% of the responsibilities for our children and we don’t complain (ok we sometimes complain and are entitled to
Do so!) that means no matter what we have to show up and step up. We try to go to every parent teacher meeting, every assembly, every after school activity and every sports game or we watch our children’s heart break if we can’t go because we have to work.
We have 1 income with all of the same bills as a two income family, we learn to
Budget and be frugal with everything. We go without for years just to put clothes on our kids ever growing backs.....I’m still wearing my ripped jeans from 1989, they’re ‘retro’ if anyone asks.. We are the parent that comforts our babies when they are hurt or sick or sad, the one who is blamed for everything that goes wrong and the one who is there for all the firsts.. Continued in comments*
This photo shows so much and more world leaders need to sit down, shut up and start taking notes. .
.
This photo shows Jacinda Arden being the undeniable source of comfort that the Muslim community, New Zealand and the rest of the world watching from our lounge rooms so badly need.
.
.
This photo shows a woman who chose to use language that was inclusive of our Muslim brothers and sisters not once suggesting that there is a them and an us, it shows a woman who has not referred to her people as immigrants or suggested that they invaded the land like so many other supposed leaders have chosen to do so.
.
.
This photo shows the youngest, female prime minister presenting herself in such a way that the world has not witnessed in many years, It shows a leader with integrity and who is powerful and clearly is a compassionate human.
.
.
This photo shows an empathetic human who has remained composed in the face of adversity and the world can see a woman who is genuinely affected by this awful tragedy and not trying to use it to further her own agenda.
.
.
This photo shows Jacinda Ardern, a woman worthy of the title world leader, the Prime Minister of New Zealand.
.
.
@jacindaardern photo credit Kirk Hargreaves of Christchurch city council
She lost her daddy to suicide a year ago now and it hasn’t gotten easier and it isn’t getting better.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She has been having a lot of moments lately, she has been crying over the smallest of things, slamming doors and yelling at me and her sisters telling us she hates us.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She asks me to look at his photos I have kept on my phone most mornings and some days it makes her happy and I watch as her eyes light up and a huge smile creeps across her face and I know that day will be a good day.
Other days she snuggles into me and tells me she doesn’t remember her daddy and asks me to tell her stories to each one of the pictures, tears roll down her cheeks and she sobs and sobs hard. I know these days will not be so good.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She watches tv and I can see her little brain working overtime, I know her inquisitive mind is trying to process what is happening and then she asks me why movie characters can die and then be ok again, can daddy be ok again?
She doesn’t understand yet.
She sees me cry when she is feeling heartbroken, she knows I get sad when she is sad and then thinks it is her fault, she asks if she upset me as she wipes away my tears and I tell her that she makes mummy the happiest mummy in the entire world.
I can’t tell her that I am angry at the world, I am angry that this happened to her and I am angry that I am powerless to mend her tiny broken heart.
She doesn’t understand yet.
She doesn’t understand why she has these feelings and outbursts and often cries and asks why she is so sad in her heart.
She has been dreaming of her daddy lately, she wakes herself up by calling him out for him and all I can do is hold her as she cries herself back to sleep whispering that I will never leave her even though I know that I shouldn’t make that promise to her but her fear of me leaving her consumed her some days.
She doesn’t understand yet. (Continued in comments and link in bio)
Me: I’m being too political with my posts lately go back to what you know.... .
.
Also me:
.
@the.pringle.collection thanks for the tee babe!
.
.
.
.
@willconnooly_
Some days I wake up and have my shit together, other days I am literally mumming on fumes.....today is that day.
.
.
Being sick and not sleeping is taking its toll on my mental health and depression is creeping in slowly. Having bipolar disorder can leave me feeling like Alice in Wonderland and when I feel myself falling down that all too familiar rabbit hole the fear of never finding my way out is very real.
.
.
I get to the crossroads with ‘this way’ and ‘that way’ Signs pointing in every direction with only the Mad Hatter to ask for directions only the mad hatter is just a reflection of me trapped in my own mind.
.
.
Tonight I am taking it easy, I am giving myself a break and being kind to me and enjoying a tea. I fed the kids chips and pies, I let them watch tv and had absolutely no fucks to give!
.
.
Then I sent them to bed way before their normal bedtime.... if they get up then Off with their heads!
.
.
#mumthatsabadword .
.
.
.
.
#bipolar #bipolardisorderawareness #depression #gotobed #chipsandpies #beingkind #bekindtoyourself #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealth #bpd #madhatter #nofucksgiven #mumstyle #mummyblogger #motherhoodunplugged #parentingunplugged #raw #realshit #greentea #selfawareness #forgivingmyself #mumming
Because She kicks like a girl!
.
.
I am sure you have all read the headlines about the sexual abuse Tayla Harris received online when the AFLW posted this photo of Tayla kicking like a girl, the comments were vile and so were the men who wrote them. .
.
7AFL made the decision to remove the photo instead of the men who made the comments and have gone on to issue an apology and reinstate the photo after realising what an absolute monumental fuck up that was and realising (with help from the public) the negative impact of the message that it sent to not only women, but to the men who believe that this is ok and engage in such online abuse.
.
.
To the men who made derogatory comments, FUCK YOU AND YOUR NOISE!
.
.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING NOISE!
.
.
This is an outstanding photo of a phenomenal sports person doing her job and doing it damn well I might add, I hope that more young people see Tayla for the role model she is.
.
.
I can only hope that young people everywhere emulate her dedication to the path they choose in their lives and that they too learn how to kick like a girl!
.
.
(Photo credit to Michael Wilson at afl media)
.
.
@tayla_harris #mumthatsabadword
We’ve all seen egg boy and his now famous egg attack on that politician, what’s his face’ and I’m not here to comment whether I’m team egg boy or team fuck face (hint: I did NOT get a team Fuck face shirt made!) instead I wanted to talk about a comment I read in one of the threads.
Scrolling through the comments and this guy who according to his profile pic is a ginger cat holding an Aussie flag named Frank had made a judgment that went a little something like ‘little prick must of been brought up by a single mother... Woah!!!! Settle down there tiger, who owns you, Terri freaking Crews?
I have been a single mum since my baby’s father died a year ago and I am a damn good single mother, the stigma that we are all sitting on welfare and sucking our ex’s bank accounts dry in child support whilst our unruly kids run wild in the streets is an old tired story that keeps getting told but it is a really boring, unintelligent story.
Single mothers are some of the most resourceful people on the planet, we need to be able to help our children overcome any issues that arise on the spot and be ingenious about it. When my kids show me their homework and ask for help I die a little more inside and then google the shit out of how to do math with letters and figure out how A+B =Z!
We take on 100% of the responsibilities for our children and we don’t complain (ok we sometimes complain and are entitled to
Do so!) that means no matter what we have to show up and step up. We try to go to every parent teacher meeting, every assembly, every after school activity and every sports game or we watch our children’s heart break if we can’t go because we have to work.
We have 1 income with all of the same bills as a two income family, we learn to
Budget and be frugal with everything. We go without for years just to put clothes on our kids ever growing backs.....I’m still wearing my ripped jeans from 1989, they’re ‘retro’ if anyone asks.. We are the parent that comforts our babies when they are hurt or sick or sad, the one who is blamed for everything that goes wrong and the one who is there for all the firsts.. Continued in comments*
This photo shows so much and more world leaders need to sit down, shut up and start taking notes. .
.
This photo shows Jacinda Arden being the undeniable source of comfort that the Muslim community, New Zealand and the rest of the world watching from our lounge rooms so badly need.
.
.
This photo shows a woman who chose to use language that was inclusive of our Muslim brothers and sisters not once suggesting that there is a them and an us, it shows a woman who has not referred to her people as immigrants or suggested that they invaded the land like so many other supposed leaders have chosen to do so.
.
.
This photo shows the youngest, female prime minister presenting herself in such a way that the world has not witnessed in many years, It shows a leader with integrity and who is powerful and clearly is a compassionate human.
.
.
This photo shows an empathetic human who has remained composed in the face of adversity and the world can see a woman who is genuinely affected by this awful tragedy and not trying to use it to further her own agenda.
.
.
This photo shows Jacinda Ardern, a woman worthy of the title world leader, the Prime Minister of New Zealand.
.
.
@jacindaardern photo credit Kirk Hargreaves of Christchurch city council
